I Still Believe!!!

I have not, nor will I, loose my faith!  I still believe!

My youngest son, William, and I sat down this morning to discuss the latest news on his brother, my oldest son, Trent. Then we discussed the latest tragic news from his oldest sister, Nisa.

He expressed concern for himself or his other sister, Emily. "Who is next, Mom?" he asked me.

"What do you mean," I replied. "You've already had your tragedy, and so has Emily."

Which got me to thinking: It's been a rough six months! We are being tested and it has only just now occurred to me how tested we have been. But...

I still Believe!!!

However, in order to make my point, here's a brief recap of the past six months.

• My mom died from a long battle with Alzheimer's. She lived in our home a little over three years while we cared for her as she slowly faded away from us into the blank nothingness pit of Alzheimer's. In the end, we changed her diapers, bathed her, fed her, dressed her, and medicated her every two hours around the clock to help her pass as peacefully as possible. She, however, didn't go very quietly. She fought it to the bitter end. I sat with her, played her favorite music, read the bible to her, talked to her, and continued to care for her physical needs for five days as she slowly left this earth. 

• My father-in-law had three heart related surgeries in a two month period. 

• My mother-in-law is in bad health with a colon-related disease coupled with COPD related problems. 

• I found out my thyroid is deteriorating. I'm already dealing with an auto-immune disease, Ulcerative Colitis.

William's car in flames

• William's car burst into flames on the highway. He walked away unharmed (thank God), the car and everything in it was destroyed.

• Emily's partner, and father of her baby, had two strokes and was rendered paralyzed in both his arms. One more so than the other. He is now undergoing intensive physical therapy and is slowly regaining use in one arm/hand and some in the other. But I have no idea if he'll be able to provide financially for his family again.  And if we back up a few more months, I can tell you about Emily's daughter loosing the end of her ring finger on her left hand to a dog bite through the fence. (Truly not the dog's or anyone else's fault.)

Identical Twins

• Nisa found out she is pregnant with twins, (she already has three boys) then received a false positive for the twins having Downs Syndrome. A follow up blood test proved they are fine. But yesterday, at 18 weeks pregnant, she has had to put down her beloved dog, Miss.

Little Miss

She had to do this alone because Jason is working five-hundred miles from home (that was hard on him). If you've been or lived with any one who was pregnant, you know how emotionally charged a woman is during this time and to have to do this life/death necessity was devastating to her.  And hard on her mother's heart-link to her child.

• My husband had hernia surgery and has been on LWOP from work for six weeks.

• Then there's Trent. He had a roll-over one-car accident Sunday, Aug 10, and mangled his left elbow. He saved his own life by asking a woman who had stopped to help for her belt and tied it on his arm to stop the massive bleeding. He is in the hospital at the time of this writing. He will be there three to four more weeks and has had three (or is it four?) surgeries to repair the damage to his elbow, plus a skin/muscle/vascular graph from his thigh. It has been rough on his wife, because they have a one-month-old son who is still breast feeding, a two year old son, and two daughters: thirteen and seventeen. 

• Their seventeen-year-old daughter passed out at volley ball practice two days ago, and was rushed to another hospital. We thought it was a heart-related thing or gall bladder, but turns out to be an ovarian cyst and GI problems. 

• Their two-year-old son spiked a fever and they thought it was an ear infection. Turned out to be a virus. Her mother and father and Trent's father and step-mother live in the area and are helping cover the home front as well as rotate at the hospital with Seventeen-year-old and Trent, so that Adrienne (Trent's wife) can rotate among the two hospitals and home. 

By the way, I started a fundraiser for Trent. If you feel lead to help, here it is.

***

Yeah, it's been a rough six months.

Last night, I had a melt down! But eventually I stood up, stared the devil in the face and said, "NO! I still believe. God is good all the time and all the time God is good! You have no hold on my family. Get thee behind me Satan."

I fell on my knees and prayed. I called my pastors and they prayed with me over the phone while I knelt down beside my bed. Then I claimed the words from the bible that "whatsoever you ask in Jesus' name it shall be delivered." And then I claimed healing over my son, over my granddaughter and my grandson. I claimed strength over Adrienne and Nisa ... and myself, protection over the twins and Nisa during the gestation, and protection for William in all that he does.

This will be our testimony!  We will glorify God and tell others how all these things happened and we persevered.

The Bible says: Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. -James 1:2-4




Yes, I still believe. My faith is intact. I will not falter. I pray my Heavenly Father is pleased with me in the end and says, "Well done, my good and faithful child."

Hallelujah!

Amen!